Media Personality Toyosi Phillips Writes Letter To Her Younger Self As She Turns 30 Today
Dear Salt of the Earth,
Looking at you, I know you have no idea what lies ahead so I’ll tell you. Your life will stay perfect for a little while longer and thankfully, all your needs will be met.
Seeing your grand mother every weekend at her face-me-I-face-you in Amukoko will open your innocent eyes to the limitations of poverty; going to the best of primary schools in Nigeria will open those same eyes to the power of wealth. You’ll spend the early part of your life trying to fit into both worlds. You’ll be a misfit in both.
You’ll make and lose good friends as you grow older- some, due to your stupidity some due to theirs but none of these losses would have the same significance as daddy’s death. Yes, he dies; and even though you’ll play the “my father is dead” pity-card over and over again to get out of trouble in high school and college, you’ll genuinely miss him year after year as you’re forced to grow up quickly. You’ll be misunderstood by loved ones and you’ll become angry… very angry… at everything and at everyone but you’ll hide the anger from all but those who love you the most- maybe because you have faith in their love for you. You’ll snap at the slightest of things behind closed doors but put on your cheery mask just as you step outside those same doors and every sincere, “how are you?” that’s sent your way will be met with a chirpy, insincere, “fine, thank you”.
Spirit-Controlled Temperament will change your life. You’ll read it over and over again and realize that you’re intrinsically susceptible to lust and anger. A foolproof solution is however proffered in the book and the little spark of spirituality you have in you will become a full-blown fire. “Know Jesus, know peace” will become real to you as you feel all the anger and hostility seep out of your heart. Your life will change for good.
Spoiler alert munchkin: You’ll move to New York City and you’ll find yourself even more and fall deeply in love with the person you’ve become. The crying will stop, you’ll forgive and seek forgiveness, you’ll live and you’ll thrive. A few days before you turn thirty, you’ll decide to write a letter to your younger self; a letter reminding her that she’s beautiful and blessed, a letter assuring her that she’ll be fine regardless.