I was invited to my friend Nnenna’s sons 5th birthday costume party. As I was walking in, a mutual friends nanny was coming down the stairs behind another friends rather rambunctious little boy. I could see him making monster faces and swinging his arms and pretending to be a gorilla as I made my way to the top of the stairs (heading to the first floor) where the party was. I was trying to avoid eye contact with the rascal as he came down and I climbed up but before I knew it the boy had reached me and punched both my breasts so hard and showed me his muscles then said to his nanny ” I’m strong”! He hit so hard and before I knew it, I had given him a reactionary “back-hand” shove before I realised he was a friends child. He ran off crying and told his mother I slapped him and the drama started from there.

As soon as I settled down, his mother came to confront me about hitting her child. BTW, I have a 6 year old girl who doesn’t go around punching people but maybe boys are different. I told her it was reactionary/reflex because I wasn’t expecting a hard punch to my breasts so I shoved him away. She yelled at how mean I was and said I had no right to put hands on her child and I should have scolded him or come to meet her. She was so angry and caused a scene. She left the event and warned me never to touch her son again if not I’d have her to contend with. Of which I responded if you train your child well so he wouldn’t go around punching adults in the boobs. She most certainly took offence to the insinuation that she was a bad mother and she dressed me down before leaving the event.

Mothers can certainly be bizarre and deluded. Of course it became the topic of conversation for everyone. My friend Toks said to me that this same child had been biting other kids for fun and she had to go and separate him from wrestling and biting her son. She did say she thinks I should apologise for touching the boy because the story can easily spiral out of control and people in general would say I should have been more restrained as the adult!

Credit: Cornelia O’Dwyer

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