Relationships

Important Things To Know Before Getting Into A Relationship

Relationship

Relationships are a big deal, not only because it means you will be sharing your life with someone but because it might lead to marriage which is a bigger deal. So it is quite important to do it right. Before going into a relationship, there are some things you have to know. Here they are:

Get to know yourself

If you do not make the commitment of understanding yourself emotionally, you will always go into romantic relationships from an emotionally dependent place. You may have the unrealistic idea that someone else will know how to understand you and make you happy even when you may not. Make a conscious effort to observe your emotional reactions to the people and events in your life. Reflect on your feelings and talk with people about how you feel or what you are noticing about yourself, without expecting them to fix you.

Do your research

This is really important. Ask questions from mutual friends, relatives and basically anyone who will tell you the truth. Getting into a relationship is a commitment so you have to be sure about who you are committed to. If there are no ulterior motives, then he/she wouldn’t mind. Get your detective suit on and do the work

Relationship

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Understand there are no excuses for bad behaviour

It is common when attracted to someone to want to rationalize their poor behaviour. If someone treats you with disrespect, take this as data about who he or she is as a person. If you try to talk with someone and he or she dismisses you, take this seriously. If a person says he/she is not looking for “anything serious” or he/she needs a lot of “space,” let them go. This person is not in the same place you are and may not want the same things you want. Believe what people communicate about themselves. It is not your job to show someone a better way; it is your job to work on growing better as a person

Press the brakes on sex

Trying to achieve emotional intimacy through sex is not healthy. Hoping that a sexual relationship will eventually lead to a more emotionally intimate or committed relationship hardly works. Relationships that start with sex before emotional intimacy is present usually don’t become committed relationships. You will spend your time hoping and working to get someone to change when you could be putting your energy into evolving and finding someone who likes the person you are

 

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