“Conversation, like certain portions of the anatomy, always runs more smoothly when lubricated.” ? Marquis de Sade
Every relationship should have open, honest communication embedded in its foundation. It is a vital part of every healthy relationship. Are you currently experiencing problems in your relationship? The tips below will help open the airways for better communication. Is your relationship already very healthy? These tips will equally remind you about what it takes to maintain a healthy relationship, and add to your knowledge bank.
For a healthier and better communication:
Choose/Find the Right Time
Do you have something that bothers you? Would you like to discuss it with your partner? It would be helpful if you talked about it with your partner. Look for the right time to talk about it. You both have busy schedules? Select a time. Find a time when both of you are calm, relaxed, not in a rush, and not distracted.
A lot of serious issues are discussed over the phone or via SMS in some relationships. Avoid talking about serious matters or issues in writing. Text messages, and even calls can be misinterpreted. Talk in person, looking at each other, watching the expressions and taking note of them, so there will not be any unnecessary miscommunication or misinterpretation. If you’re having trouble collecting your thoughts, consider writing them down ahead of time and reading them out loud to your partner.
Do Not Attack
Even when couples mean well, they can sometimes come across as harsh because of their word choice and tone of voice while talking to themselves. Using “you” can sound like you’re attacking, which will make your partner become defensive and less receptive to your message. Instead, try using “I” or “we.” For example, say “I feel like we haven’t been as close lately” instead of “You have been distant from me.”
Agree to be honest. Sometimes the truth hurts, but it’s the key to a healthy relationship. A relationship founded on trust can withstand anything, if the truth is always shared – no matter how damning it is. Admit that you aren’t always perfect and apologize when you make a mistake, instead of making excuses. You will feel better and it will help strengthen your relationship.
Check Your Body Language
Let your partner know you’re really listening by giving them your full attention: sit up, face them and make eye contact when speaking. Don’t take a phone call, read an SMS or play a video game when you’re talking. Show your partner you respect them by listening and responding.
While it is tempting to not want to say anything for the sake of peace, it is not advisable to harbour hurt or grudge in the heart for too long. Share with your partner. He has hurt you? Tell him! He might not even know he did that. You feel she stabbed you in the back? Tell her; she might not know what she did. Besides, neither of you can see the other’s thoughts. Do not stay angry with each other for too long. None of you benefits from doing so. You hurt only yourselves. Communicate freely and enjoy your love relationship. J