#LetterToSisters: Beating the fish brain syndrome
I just hope that this will not get me into trouble of any kind because it seems I am not trying to mind my business here. Hello sisters, please forgive me in advance if I end up saying something that will hurt somebody. Always remember that I have already apologized, so don’t ask for it again.
While I was growing up, I saw my friends address girls as people with ‘fish brain’ without even understanding what they meant until I was forced to consult my Modern Biology textbook and saw how tiny that brain was.
It was always funny to listen to their exploits with girls; there was always something new for them with the annoying part being that they used the same method to mark all these achievements.
Using the same method got them the same result and that was simply sleeping with the girls. It was the end of the story for any journey between a boy and girl then because we were born when hip-hop was invented. It was the music of money, alcohol, women and sex; there was nothing like true love in the lyrics of these songs.
Meanwhile, this is not about men or boys, but about the so called ‘fish brained’ humans and in this epistle to our lovely sisters around the world, I will try to talk about what I cannot change. Yes! I can’t change all of it but I will be helping some people who really need it.
The Fish and fisherman
The challenge facing everyone in this world of plenty is choice and while every man will have to choose a woman; women will have to wait to be chosen.
Men are the fishermen and women are the fishes, but what is the bait? The desires of the women are the baits. Men are more like the fishermen without a bait. Forget about the money they throw around, forget about the promises they make which turn out to be their wooing abracadabra.
When a man throws whatever he has, he expects you to need him and run after him. The drive is not what he has put before you, but your desire to have him and those things.
Imagine having all the fishes in the water contented with what they have eaten so far, they would just see the dangling lines of the fishermen as another object in the water.
Cutting your desires
Life is not just about satisfying some desires. I know it is very difficult because sometimes you want to trust and love someone who might turn out to be the wrong guy.
Taking time to yield is the key and knowing that you have the bait with you is the foundation of losing the ‘fish brain’. Like I said earlier, the bus stop of most relationships is sex and there can never be sex if you don’t open your legs which means you have the key to his calls, love and caring. This is difficult though, because at times ladies drag men into sex and it not more like men are always the ‘he-goat’ they are tagged, but the opposite often come into play.
Cut your curiosity
This is actually why fishes end up in the hook. Sometimes they are not hungry but they want to see what is dangling on the hooks. You don’t like him, but you want to hang out with him because he is caring and always ready to take you to nice places.
Have you forgotten that the gift of a man makes way for him? As long as you keep hanging out, one day, you would want to see something new and if it ends up to be sex, that might be the end of the good times you have with.
Sex has been conceptualized as the weakness of the woman, even though it is an act between a man and a woman. Men wrote the Bible, dictionary and almost everything you can draw knowledge from and I am very sure that if women are given the opportunity to rewrite some of these books, they would wipe the stigma in sleeping with men.
Except in the sight of God, fornication, adultery and prostitution are all the sins of a woman, so you need to get your yielding point so high.
Don’t be a hungry alter that takes everything that is placed in front of it. There is power in rejection, so use it. Stay away from what you don’t want and people you don’t like no matter how interesting they are pretending to be. No matter how much you love Australia, it can never be in Africa so stop imagining bad people being good. It is not the job of your imagination to make that possible.
The fish is a smart animal which is why it can survive where men die. Underwater. If you can create your own ocean and hide under it, only few people who are serious will be able to swim to that depth to get to you.
Dear sisters, you deserve all the good treatments in the world, but you have to keep yourself.