Nothing can keep you from a happier and better future than a lingering relationship wound for an ex. It doesn’t matter what the circumstances were or who was right and who was wrong. The point is that it hurts and the pain is stopping you from moving on. Although time they say is the best healer, there are some steps you can also take to hasten the process:
Cut off all communication
You do not need to be friends, at least not while you are hurting. Taking care of yourself and your emotional well-being is very important. People hang on to the idea of friendship with their ex as a way of keeping the relationship alive because letting go seems too overwhelming. When you are hurting, you are vulnerable so protect yourself with healthy boundaries. Let your ex know you need space and would prefer not to be in touch
Let go
Majority of the pain people experience during a break-up sometimes have nothing to do with the relationship they really had. Relationships always end for a reason. It is most times because things aren’t going well. Most people don’t want back the relationship they had, what they mourn is the relationship they thought they could have had if things had been different, forgetting that relationship didn’t exist. Almost all relationships are great in the beginning but the point of a relationship is what it was from beginning to end. While our mind is trying to heal our heart, the painful memories often get shifted to the background and we find ourselves remembering and longing for the good times. Letting go of a dream can be quite painful but also remember all the bad things that happened
Make peace with the past
Nothing hurts as much as when someone you love does something that causes you to re-evaluate who you believed them to be. When someone betrays your trust, it can be quite painful. But you shouldn’t let what someone else did limit your moving forward. Forgiveness isn’t about letting someone else off the hook for their behaviour; it is about your emotional freedom. If you find yourself angry at something that someone did or didn’t do, try and remember the good qualities you saw in them when you first met, and recognize that we all have flaws
Love is not at fault
Love is always right. When someone comes into your life that gives you the gift of experiencing love, be grateful. However, recognize that love alone isn’t always enough to make a relationship work. Other factors such as timing, incompatible values and the choices we make play a significant role in whether a relationship will thrive
Love yourself
Moving on from a relationship that didn’t work is about loving yourself. Believing that you deserve to be in a loving and healthy relationship with someone who shares your values and treats you well requires that you view yourself in a positive light